Most people have limiting beliefs but don’t even realize it. You only come to understand limiting beliefs if you’re encountering repeated frustration at not being able to perform at a high level or you’re faced with immense pain to which you are no stranger (you’ve been here over and over again).
Why are limiting beliefs so powerful?
Limiting beliefs are deeply ingrained thoughts, attitudes, or convictions that hold you back, cause you to self-sabotage, and generally get in between you and your goals. These beliefs are usually self-imposed and may not be grounded in reality. They can stem from past experiences, upbringing, societal conditioning, or even fear of the unknown. Overcoming limiting beliefs is essential for personal growth and achieving success.
Limiting beliefs manifest as an internal movie playing in the background in the form of repeated thoughts, reactions, assumptions, beliefs…. They’re pervasive and subtle – so subtle that you take them for granted and let them ride in the background of your consciousness. They look, feel, and sound like facts – the core of self-sabotage. The internal movie then controls what you focus on – it’s like colored glasses that block certain things out or even walls where you cannot see past them. By directing your focus, your limiting beliefs act as a roadmap for your actions. They guide you towards working and pursuing what fulfills your beliefs. If you believe you’re not good enough, you’ll behave like you’re not good enough.
For example, Let’s say you have the common belief “I’m not good enough,” and you struggle to learn or do something. Playing in the back of your mind is the loop and a spectrum of similar and other limiting beliefs just gnawing at you as you try to overcome the obstacles normal in any goal-driven pursuit. You start to see each challenge and obstacle not as expected and as part of the price of the pursuit but as mounting evidence for how you’re “not good enough.” At a certain point, the tension and pressure cannot be ignored, and you will most likely give up. Of course, it’s easy and comfortable to find an external reason or person to blame, but all along, it was the limiting beliefs. And for as long as they remain hidden and unaddressed, they will run you amuck in your life.
At some point, you’ll have glimpses that the common element in all of your problems and challenges is inside of you. You can run from these moments of clarity, but you cannot hide. You’ll come up against these beliefs whenever you conflict with them – and they’ll always, as long as they exist, WIN.
And this is when those interested in change, goals, high performance, or just a more fulfilling and happier life will conclude the demons they’ve been running from are living in their own mind.
How do you overcome limiting beliefs?
This can be very challenging – you’ll have levels of beliefs that will reveal themselves as you dig. For the fastest way, you should get professional help.
You can get a good way on your own, and here are some suggestions:
Self-awareness is the first step towards overcoming limiting beliefs. You must pay attention to your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Notice when you feel self-doubt, fear or engage in negative self-talk. Recognize that these are indicators of underlying limiting beliefs. Just recognizing them can be a huge step towards overcoming them.
Identify Your Limiting Beliefs:
Try to identify the specific limiting beliefs that are holding you back. These might include beliefs like “I’m not good enough,” “I can’t succeed,” or “I don’t deserve happiness.” Write them down to make them more concrete. This can take time.
First, you’ll uncover the surface beliefs. Still, if you stick to the process, you can get to the deeper ones that cause impulse control issues, anger issues, and other self-sabotaging behaviors. Be patient and curious.
Trace Their Origins:
Journaling can be super helpful with this step. Try and dig into the roots of the beliefs: Were they formed in childhood? Are they a result of past experiences? You want to be as specific as possible – when, where, what exactly happened that caused you to buy into such a belief.
The origins can be trauma, but you don’t need to have had significant trauma to form limiting beliefs. When you’re a child, you’re vulnerable to creating incorrect beliefs because of the nature of your dependence on your parents and others around you for survival. This is a primal drive programmed into all humans.
Challenge and Question:
The key to this step is to deeply absorb and accept that your limiting belief is FALSE. If you accomplish this, the belief will no longer have any emotional strength or sting – it should ring flat.
This is where the Lefkoe Method, a method that I use, shines. The process is designed to uncover core limiting beliefs and then disarm and dissipate them so they never affect you again.
This is the step where many people working on their own can get hung up – they cannot get to the point where they diffuse the belief of all emotion. If there is any emotion left in connection with the belief, it can still rear its ugly head, especially if you are under stress.
I offer a free first session – where we can do belief work, and if we do, you will see what it feels like to clear a limiting belief completely.
Eliminating limiting beliefs can truly be life-changing. When you remove the glasses and tear down the wall, you see an entirely different world.
I have had many clients make a change that was impossible for them to make after years of struggle and self-sabotage.
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How Do I Help Clients Resolve Limiting Beliefs
I use a combination of the Lefkoe Method and deep identity work. Here is a basic framework for the process.
- Identifying limiting beliefs: First, we discuss your goals, desires, habits, and some of the thoughts and beliefs that surround them. We’ll dig into some deep beliefs linked to these goals and desires. The first step in the Lefkoe Method is to identify the specific limiting beliefs that are holding you back. These beliefs can be deeply ingrained and may be related to self-worth, abilities, or perceptions of the world.
- Understanding the origins of beliefs: Once identified, you explore the origins of these beliefs. You try to know where and how these beliefs developed. Often, these beliefs stem from childhood experiences or influential figures in your life.
- Challenge the beliefs: The next step is to question and challenge the validity of these beliefs. Morty Lefkoe’s method is based on the idea that beliefs are not inherently true but rather interpretations of events. By challenging the underlying assumptions that support these beliefs, you can start to change your perspective.
I offer a free first session. This isn’t a fluff session where I tell you how great I am and how you need to hire me. This session is a work session. We will do some belief work, and you will experience how it can work for you.
Start Your Journey Today
Schedule a Free Initial Session